What, What, What

You know its gotten bad when you realize you're a mean person and you've been a real witch to those who still love you. I'm changing, trying, hoping. The three things I never do.

Inspiration Point

Inspiration is by no means my way of life. Inspiration strikes me at odd moments during odd conversations with rare people. By 'rare' I mean that they must be a certain sort of being in order to strike such a chord in me. This will not be a list of such people, but a study of where I draw my inspiration. I am almost positive that I do not know myself where it comes from. The things that never fail to inspire me or humble me, for inspiration really the reaction of the soul to its being humbled by something that it recognizes as greater than itself, are the setting summer sun as it sinks like a giant orange-sherbert colored plate in a washed-out blue sink of a sky. I am inspired by moments in my adulthood that resemble images retained from childhood. I think I've figured it out. I can sit here and list the things that inspire me and never quite get my finger on it, so I won't. The closest I can come to knowing how to seek inspiration is to seek my childhood. Lucky me!

Collecting, Protecting

Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft. I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while doing it.

I love Anne Lamott.

The High Road

But mark how a Godly heart goes beyond a Carnal; all outward peace is not enough but I must have the peace of God. But suppose you have the peace of God, Will not that quiet you? No I must have the God of peace, as the peace of God, so the God of peace, that is I must enjoy that God that gives me the peace, I must have the Cause as well as the Effect; I must see from whence my peace comes and enjoy the fountain of my peace as well as the stream of my peace.

-Burroughs

goodness, truth, beauty

life is b e a u t i f u l and meaningful. its a weird feeling. i'm very happy.


goodbye, goodnight, go under the mercy.